It's probably one of the funnest things about having a child and it seems to be better when the kid's ADD. Some of the random stuff that comes out of BrotherJ's mouth is absolutely hilarious. I know he doesn't mean anything by what he says, he's just being descriptive. However, taken out of context, some of the remarks are just insane really. Take this evening, for instance.
We were out celebrating BrotherZ's 9th birthday and were at The Macaroni Grill (he likes the pizza there). So we get an appetizer and just sit around joking a bit and letting the kids go all Pollack on the tablecloth (I should have taken a pic, damn me... I gotta get used to this microblogging stuff). Eventually dinner comes and BrotherJ tears into the pizza he ordered (same deal, he likes the pizza there). Suddenly, he stops to make a pronouncement that the pizza "is like a bomb going off in my mouth and it's busting my bubbles." I'm seriously dumbfounded here because I really can't believe that just came out of his mouth. Of course, I should believe it since, just a couple months ago while eating strawberries (his favorite), he declared that the flavor was just "bursting in my mouth." So, clearly, things exploding in his mouth seems to be the most effective way to communicate good flavor.
Now, we often joke around about BrotherJ since, well, we think he's probably going to wind up gay. We're not against it or anything, unless he becomes a Furry.. then I'm probably going to have to have a long talk with him and a shrink, but that's beside the point. So yes, we think the kid's going to end up gay and that, in all likelihood, he's going to be 1) flamboyant and 2) a bottom (ie: a receiver). It may seem odd or cruel to make jokes like this since he's only 9, but KoekjeMom and I seem to find it a discussion-worthy topic whenever he decides to kick out gems like the above. What's funny about it is that the boy clearly has a nerd streak in him and it tends to come out in random ways, but mostly through clothing. He pairs things together that make no sense, like dress shirts and wind pants.. seriously. Jeans? If even a nanometer of underwear shows, he freaks and hikes his pants up to his nipples. I know it's just that he's pairing stuff together that's comfortable for him, but it just makes me wonder.
And then there's the topper. When he gets excited, he squee's a bit and does this exuberant happy-clap thing that just sends me and KoekjeMom into spasms of laughter. Again, he's not doing it intentionally, he's just that excited. Honestly, this kid's one of the most entertaining people I've been around and it just gets better.
By the way BrotherZ... happy birthday man. I hope it was a good day for you and I can't wait until your party on Saturday. :)
Monday, September 15, 2008
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Let's Start Spreading The Word...
Hey folks...
Quick little update here, but I wanted to point out something I found online tonight.
I found this tonight when I went searching for random family members on Twitter (seriously) and this site happened to pop up when I looked up my favorite cousin's husband's name. I won't go into the whole history here, but they do have one child who is autistic. The site was founded as a way to help others who have children with autism come together and work together to help manage this condition in their children. Frankly, I think this is probably one of the coolest sites I've ever seen. Of course, part of that is because I happen to have a somewhat direct-ish relation to one of the owners. The other part is that it's just an incredible site.
There's so many ways to help support the site (they do have a store and you can bet that I'll be dropping some cash there soon enough), but the best thing you can do is tell people.
If you have a child with autism.
If you don't.
If you have a child.
If you don't.
If you know someone with autism, or who has a child with autism.
If you don't.
Please get the word out. Just tell 5 of your friends and encourage those friends to tell 5 of their friends. I cannot stress how important this is, especially as I'm step-father to a child who is ADD, so I understand how things can get difficult at times and how having a good support network is so critical. So tell people. Tweet it, Jaiku it, StumblTumblMyFriendRSSBook it, just let people know.
Thanks much. :)
Oh and Hi Kent!!
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Next Stop: Big Bang!
"9:30. First beam injected and stopped at 1/8 of a circuit. Loud applause in the control room."
And with that, en exciting era in science begins as the Large Hadron Collider begins it's initial test to ensure that all systems are working properly. It's a historic moment and the buildup to this event has been utterly palpable. It's had a profound effect on everyone, ranging from the most respected minds in physics, all the way across to those who feel that this will herald the end of the Earth as we know it. The buildup to this event has been a long time coming and is the beginning of the culmination of a project that's been more than a quarter of a century in development.
For those not aware, the Large Hadron Collider is a project meant to help physicists understand the very nature of matter. Most of the hype surrounds the potential discovery of the Higgs Boson, the so-called "God Particle" that will help explain how mass is constructed out of massless energy. Some religious scholars feel that this flies directly in the face of a Creationist view of world origin. Some scientists believe that this will certainly unlock many, many secrets of particle physics, thus opening all sorts of doors into research as to how everythin
g in our world is made. There are even a few who feel that the collision of particles on this scale will end up causing several "miniature black holes" that will undoubtedly rip our world apart. The debate over these principles has raged for decades, picking up steam in recent years as the construction of the LHC neared completion.
Speaking for myself, I am very excited by all of this. While I do hold religious views, I believe that science and religion can peacefully coexist and that the LHC can help unlock both the secrets of everything around us, and potentially redefine our concept of what "God" actually is. I've always felt that science is what augments religion and, thus, religion is what can help push science. Of course, I'm not a scientist, but I still hold this conviction deep in my heart. My idea is that God is a scientist as well and wants us to unlock the secrets of what has been created around us. Of course, this view is sometimes controversial, but I also feel that, eventually, it can be more widely accepted as we begin to realize that science and religion aren't all that different from each other.
Turning our attention back to the LHC. It's currently 1:06 AM PST (10:006 AM CEST) and the first beam injected has now completed one-half of the 27-kilometer "lap" back to the beginning. So far there are no reported problems aside from some "cleanup" on the beam requested by the test director. However, this is more to ensure the test gets the best possible beam to circulate and in no way reflects some of the vast safety concerns that have been raised, but otherwise disproven in a statement issued by Director General Robert Aymar.
It is now 1:18am PST (10:18am CEST) and the beam has now made the final step of it's first revolution. The final step is to send the beam through the ATLAS experiment to ensure that the ATLAS is detecting particles correctly by firing a single beam through an entire circuit in one go.
It is 1:25am PST (10:25am CEST) and the test has completed successfully. The LHC has managed to fire a single particle around it's entire 27 kilometer circuit. History has been made as the largest experiment in the world has passed its first test. From here, the next stop is 21 October, when the LHC is unveiled to the world and the first particle collisions will occur.
So many congratulations go out to the staff of dedicated engineers who've worked so very hard on this project for so very long. You all have done outstanding work and deserve to be recognized for helping humanity take another bold step in understanding and unlocking the secrets of our universe.
And with that, en exciting era in science begins as the Large Hadron Collider begins it's initial test to ensure that all systems are working properly. It's a historic moment and the buildup to this event has been utterly palpable. It's had a profound effect on everyone, ranging from the most respected minds in physics, all the way across to those who feel that this will herald the end of the Earth as we know it. The buildup to this event has been a long time coming and is the beginning of the culmination of a project that's been more than a quarter of a century in development.
For those not aware, the Large Hadron Collider is a project meant to help physicists understand the very nature of matter. Most of the hype surrounds the potential discovery of the Higgs Boson, the so-called "God Particle" that will help explain how mass is constructed out of massless energy. Some religious scholars feel that this flies directly in the face of a Creationist view of world origin. Some scientists believe that this will certainly unlock many, many secrets of particle physics, thus opening all sorts of doors into research as to how everythin
g in our world is made. There are even a few who feel that the collision of particles on this scale will end up causing several "miniature black holes" that will undoubtedly rip our world apart. The debate over these principles has raged for decades, picking up steam in recent years as the construction of the LHC neared completion.Speaking for myself, I am very excited by all of this. While I do hold religious views, I believe that science and religion can peacefully coexist and that the LHC can help unlock both the secrets of everything around us, and potentially redefine our concept of what "God" actually is. I've always felt that science is what augments religion and, thus, religion is what can help push science. Of course, I'm not a scientist, but I still hold this conviction deep in my heart. My idea is that God is a scientist as well and wants us to unlock the secrets of what has been created around us. Of course, this view is sometimes controversial, but I also feel that, eventually, it can be more widely accepted as we begin to realize that science and religion aren't all that different from each other.
Turning our attention back to the LHC. It's currently 1:06 AM PST (10:006 AM CEST) and the first beam injected has now completed one-half of the 27-kilometer "lap" back to the beginning. So far there are no reported problems aside from some "cleanup" on the beam requested by the test director. However, this is more to ensure the test gets the best possible beam to circulate and in no way reflects some of the vast safety concerns that have been raised, but otherwise disproven in a statement issued by Director General Robert Aymar.
It is now 1:18am PST (10:18am CEST) and the beam has now made the final step of it's first revolution. The final step is to send the beam through the ATLAS experiment to ensure that the ATLAS is detecting particles correctly by firing a single beam through an entire circuit in one go.
It is 1:25am PST (10:25am CEST) and the test has completed successfully. The LHC has managed to fire a single particle around it's entire 27 kilometer circuit. History has been made as the largest experiment in the world has passed its first test. From here, the next stop is 21 October, when the LHC is unveiled to the world and the first particle collisions will occur.
So many congratulations go out to the staff of dedicated engineers who've worked so very hard on this project for so very long. You all have done outstanding work and deserve to be recognized for helping humanity take another bold step in understanding and unlocking the secrets of our universe.
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Beyond The Distance of Memory...
I want to be remembered.
I want people to look back at my presence in their life and feel a small twinge of missing me. I want to move about life with the idea that people miss me and feel better for having had me as part of their life.
I know this is a sharp contrast to all of my other musings of wanting to be selfless and humble, but there are times that this gives way to a desire to wonder what people in my past think of me. If only I had a way to briefly make contact and see; to ask them how they feel when my memory comes across, if it comes across at all. I wonder if I elicit emotions anymore. I wonder if they sit up in the quiet of night, within the stir of vastness and make a conscious decision to think about me.
I think about them. All of them. My friends, my family, my loves, my losses. All of them wandering quietly through the forest of my memory. I wonder after their lives. Of course, I wish nothing but the best for them, but I still can't help but wonder.
It also comes down to wondering just how much good I do in this world. Who do I really help? Can I say, once my time is done, that I've truly done what I could for those around me? Or have I reached a point where I gave Just Enough? And, honestly, what's "enough" anyways? How do I quantify any of this? How can I say "this is a quantity and this quantity is what I'm supposed to reach for and achieve?" Some days I have real trouble with that.
And it isn't because I want find a stopping point, but I'd rather just know if I am doing good. Yes, virtue should be its own reward, but is it asking too much that I be able to measure what I do against some other standard? This is human nature, no? We want to know that what we do is done for the better and that we are going in a good and proper direction. It's the assurance that we all need. But then, what of assurances that we give? If I want to be remembered in life and if I want to know how good I do in life, why do I give out so little? It's as though I horde it, stopping only to give out the tiniest bits of assurances and comforts in life. Well, at certain points at least. It's reactionary. Someone has a bad day and I go to attempt to "fix" it with some words of wisdom and them move along from the moment. But there's more, so much more that I could do.
To Crystal. My Librarian. I love you so much and consider your presence in my life to be almost otherworldly. There's so much I've learned about myself through you and the journey continues to be so very interesting. There are times that I get frustrated because I don't understand what goes on around me, but it's good to know that we can somehow gets past it all. Despite the few bumps we've had, I couldn't be happier with Us. I love you.
The The Gentlemen. You two constantly confuse, aggravate, and bedevil me and it's a fascinating experience. When you two come to me for answers on worldly topics, it still just baffles me and blows me away. When your mother points out instances where you've wanted to hang out with me, or have done things in the same -sometimes strange- way that I do things, it amazes me. I never really considered myself "role model" material, but it would appear that I'm doing that with you two. Hopefully I can keep it going and continue to earn your respect and adulations.
For my Sister. For all the random-ass times I've just called you up with questions and judgement calls, you've been amazingly patient. Of course, you also call me up with similar randomness and that seems to be the key to it all. Somehow the oddities of our lives balances everything out. Some of our conversations have been absolutely amazing and others have been downright disturbing. Through it all, you've remained a stationary figure in life and that means more to me than I can ever express.
And my Brother. Where would I be without your random messages of various naked women? Of course, there's also the nights of legendary debauchery that will probably never be equaled in either of our separate lives and can only be topped when we get together. Meeting you was the start of an amazingly twisted adventure that gives me great stories to tell and will eventually give me great memories to reflect on as I begin my gradual slide into senility. Of course, what makes it better is that you'll probably be right there with me, so we'll always be in competition to see who can tell the stories the best.
The West Coast. Who else but you could have started me off on this crazy journey that eventually landed me in Oregon. While I consider my life back in Oklahoma to be a pretty good one, I've actually managed to find a great life here and a lot of that is due to you and I greatly appreciate it. You're a true friend and deserve more than this world can ever give to you. Your calm nature and ease of life constantly fascinate me. Not to mention the fact that we can make jokes about damn near anything, even if it only makes sense to us... which is most of the time.
My Mother. You are always my influence in life. Almost everything I do tends to get put through the Mommy Filter. While I haven't been the best son at times and you haven't been the best mom, we've always managed to make everything work and be there for each other right when the need was greatest. I will never be able to thank you for all that you've done for me and given to me, but I'm damn sure going to try. Part of why I've decided to give having a child with Crystal a go is partially because of you. Throughout all of my insistence that I wouldn't make a good parental figure, you've quietly made statements to the contrary. Your support is amazing and a lot of who and what I am today is because of the sacrifices that you have made in your own life. I can only hope to aspire to be like you. I love you and I can't wait for you to come to Tacoma.
There are countless others I could talk to here. To express what each has taught me, or to even vilify some of you. However, all of you have had a profound impact in my life and, for better or worse, I'm happy that you all were there, even if only briefly. I hope your lives have taken the directions that my life has taken and it is my sincere hope that you all manage to find the happiness and peace that now attempts to take root in my life.
"tear drop on the fire
fearless on my breath"
I want people to look back at my presence in their life and feel a small twinge of missing me. I want to move about life with the idea that people miss me and feel better for having had me as part of their life.
I know this is a sharp contrast to all of my other musings of wanting to be selfless and humble, but there are times that this gives way to a desire to wonder what people in my past think of me. If only I had a way to briefly make contact and see; to ask them how they feel when my memory comes across, if it comes across at all. I wonder if I elicit emotions anymore. I wonder if they sit up in the quiet of night, within the stir of vastness and make a conscious decision to think about me.
I think about them. All of them. My friends, my family, my loves, my losses. All of them wandering quietly through the forest of my memory. I wonder after their lives. Of course, I wish nothing but the best for them, but I still can't help but wonder.
It also comes down to wondering just how much good I do in this world. Who do I really help? Can I say, once my time is done, that I've truly done what I could for those around me? Or have I reached a point where I gave Just Enough? And, honestly, what's "enough" anyways? How do I quantify any of this? How can I say "this is a quantity and this quantity is what I'm supposed to reach for and achieve?" Some days I have real trouble with that.
And it isn't because I want find a stopping point, but I'd rather just know if I am doing good. Yes, virtue should be its own reward, but is it asking too much that I be able to measure what I do against some other standard? This is human nature, no? We want to know that what we do is done for the better and that we are going in a good and proper direction. It's the assurance that we all need. But then, what of assurances that we give? If I want to be remembered in life and if I want to know how good I do in life, why do I give out so little? It's as though I horde it, stopping only to give out the tiniest bits of assurances and comforts in life. Well, at certain points at least. It's reactionary. Someone has a bad day and I go to attempt to "fix" it with some words of wisdom and them move along from the moment. But there's more, so much more that I could do.
To Crystal. My Librarian. I love you so much and consider your presence in my life to be almost otherworldly. There's so much I've learned about myself through you and the journey continues to be so very interesting. There are times that I get frustrated because I don't understand what goes on around me, but it's good to know that we can somehow gets past it all. Despite the few bumps we've had, I couldn't be happier with Us. I love you.
The The Gentlemen. You two constantly confuse, aggravate, and bedevil me and it's a fascinating experience. When you two come to me for answers on worldly topics, it still just baffles me and blows me away. When your mother points out instances where you've wanted to hang out with me, or have done things in the same -sometimes strange- way that I do things, it amazes me. I never really considered myself "role model" material, but it would appear that I'm doing that with you two. Hopefully I can keep it going and continue to earn your respect and adulations.
For my Sister. For all the random-ass times I've just called you up with questions and judgement calls, you've been amazingly patient. Of course, you also call me up with similar randomness and that seems to be the key to it all. Somehow the oddities of our lives balances everything out. Some of our conversations have been absolutely amazing and others have been downright disturbing. Through it all, you've remained a stationary figure in life and that means more to me than I can ever express.
And my Brother. Where would I be without your random messages of various naked women? Of course, there's also the nights of legendary debauchery that will probably never be equaled in either of our separate lives and can only be topped when we get together. Meeting you was the start of an amazingly twisted adventure that gives me great stories to tell and will eventually give me great memories to reflect on as I begin my gradual slide into senility. Of course, what makes it better is that you'll probably be right there with me, so we'll always be in competition to see who can tell the stories the best.
The West Coast. Who else but you could have started me off on this crazy journey that eventually landed me in Oregon. While I consider my life back in Oklahoma to be a pretty good one, I've actually managed to find a great life here and a lot of that is due to you and I greatly appreciate it. You're a true friend and deserve more than this world can ever give to you. Your calm nature and ease of life constantly fascinate me. Not to mention the fact that we can make jokes about damn near anything, even if it only makes sense to us... which is most of the time.
My Mother. You are always my influence in life. Almost everything I do tends to get put through the Mommy Filter. While I haven't been the best son at times and you haven't been the best mom, we've always managed to make everything work and be there for each other right when the need was greatest. I will never be able to thank you for all that you've done for me and given to me, but I'm damn sure going to try. Part of why I've decided to give having a child with Crystal a go is partially because of you. Throughout all of my insistence that I wouldn't make a good parental figure, you've quietly made statements to the contrary. Your support is amazing and a lot of who and what I am today is because of the sacrifices that you have made in your own life. I can only hope to aspire to be like you. I love you and I can't wait for you to come to Tacoma.
There are countless others I could talk to here. To express what each has taught me, or to even vilify some of you. However, all of you have had a profound impact in my life and, for better or worse, I'm happy that you all were there, even if only briefly. I hope your lives have taken the directions that my life has taken and it is my sincere hope that you all manage to find the happiness and peace that now attempts to take root in my life.
"tear drop on the fire
fearless on my breath"
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
My Review: Google Chrome
So Google decided to finally enter the browser wars eh? Interesting notion that. After a random April Fool's prank and random rumors, Google finally made good on it's promise and delivered Chrome to us today after a teasing "leak" came out yesterday. Of course, there's been speculation over the possibility of a Google browser for months and yesterday's "incident" only served to heighten this speculation by giving thousands (millions?) of 'net users something to feverishly discuss on message boards across the web. And add to it the comic book released to document Chrome and you suddenly have a quickly-developing wave of interest.
Then it happened. It was almost a rush, really. Google scheduled a quick-ish press conference for today and told the world that Chrome was alive, in beta, and ready for you to
download. Was this a good move for Google? Will it portent greater things? Well, yes and no. It could be a smart coup on Google's side, or it could turn into their Waterloo. Let's take a peek inside and get some ideas.
1) Chrome is flat-out faster. It hands Internet Explorer, FireFox, Opera, Safari, and virtually any other browser out there a notice stating that things can be better. It shows that rendering a web page doesn't need to be a complicated mess. It can be made simple and e
legant. This is something that web surfers have wanted since the inception of the first graphical browser, so kudos to Google for finally delivering the goods.
2) Unless you run OSX or any flavor of Linux. Then you're just out of luck. Google has promised OSX and *nix versions in the near future, but could it be a misstep in Google's plans when it doesn't release on as many platforms as possible at the same time?
3) It eats memory. Chrome is a memory pig. It seems to latch on to as much memory as it can to ensure that speed is maintained.
4) But it's smartly done. Each tab is actually a separate instance of the browser. So while it may be using lots of memory, it's not trying to grab a chunk and continually redistribute it amongst a single process. So if one page starts bogging, you can kill that one page and not lose the entire session. It would appear that Google recognizes that browers will eventually sta
rt munching down memory, so it gives the end user the tools to manage that. Very nice.
5) No RSS integration. My feeling is that Google would hit the ground running and make it's browser integrate into the Google landscape. While gMail integration would be trick, RSS integration is an absolute basic (every version of Firefox has had it) and it's strange that Google would opt to leave it out of the beta release. I don't believe that RSS integration is that difficult to put into effect, but maybe there's something about coding I don't know that prevents this. I'm reasonably sure that this feature will be in the next iteration of Chrome, but it's still baffling that it's not in this one.
6) The KISS Principle is alive and well in Chrome. The interface is simple and there's nothing there to futz around with. This, of course, helps with the speed aspect that Google's browser seems so very proud of. So it's nice and minimal.
7) And good luck doing anything with it for now. Granted, since the browser is Open Source, addons will be coming fast and furious in the upcoming months, so look for options to abound quickly.
There's lots of other pros and cons that I could go on about, but my final assessm
ent is that the Chrome beta is just that, a beta. It's a great rolling chassis that I believe was pushed out in order to introduce the public (general and coding alike) to the idea of how software should be written, most notably for the upcoming Android cellphone release. As people begin to understand software as not just a single application, but rather a framework of usable modules, they will begin to clamor for Google's take on cell phones. Of course, this also opens Google up to its final frontier, the oft-rumored Google OS. So while this may just be another web browser, I also believe it's Google's opening for a much greater performance to come. I, for one, plan on being in on it and I suggest you consider coming along for the ride. I believe that information exchange as we know and understand it is about to be changed radically.
And for full disclosure... I've done this entire post
using Chrome.
Honestly, I really have no complaints since this is very much the beta version. I believe I'll wait for an official final release before weighing in on things.
Enjoy!
Monday, September 1, 2008
Late to the Party...
Ok.
There are some times, well, often really that I'm just flat-out late to some big phenomena. There will be some national/global event that people are deeply-involved in that I just completely miss. It's either due to a laziness, apathy, or a mixture of both; although it's usually that I just don't care enough to put forth the effort. I want to, but I just don't. Although I will say that, sometimes, missing these events tends work out in my favor. Take, for example, "The Blair Witch Project."
Of course, I know exactly what the film's about and knew it even when it was out. However, I chose not to go to it because I didn't see why people got so enthralled with a movie that, at best, was a pseudo-documentary. I know it was "groundbreaking" in that it was a film made on somewhat lo-tech equipment for a paltry cost (something like 50 thousand dollars? I know it was a small amount). Of course, movies like this have been made since the dawn of movie cameras, it's just that they hadn't made it to mass distribution until "The Blair Witch."
For those unfamiliar, the story is a "documentary" in which a trio of folks heads into the woods to investigate the legend of a "witch" who lived in the woods. Turns out, the "witch" is actually some insane killer who slaughtered a few folks. The unfortunate aspect is that the three people who go seeking this legend are eventually killed and their equipment turns up later. So the overall idea is that you're seeing this hastily-constructed footage of their trip; interestingly, the "documentary" you are seeing is the documentary of a documentary being made. So that's three layers of fake documentary it would appear. And that's the start of this film's downhill slide.
Most of the film seems to be about the filmmakers' various oddities, which mostly consists of them taking an opportunity to say "fuck" all the time and little else. Frankly, I think the purpose of the dialogue is just to provide the actual "Blair Witch"producers to have people say "fuck" all the time. The dialogue is pretty sparse and attempts to mimic "real" interactions of real people. Sadly, no. It fails. I'll give it points for effort, I guess, since the "Blair Witch" filmmakers were trying to be innovative.
The one good part of the film is the attempt to make it look real. I applaud the fact that the producers essentially gave three people two cameras and audio equipment, turned them loose in the woods, and told them to come back in a couple weeks with a few thousand feet of footage. You can tell there's not a whole lot of polish to it and that's pretty much the point. Now, had they attempted to keep it in that vein, then it'd be great. However, the film goes off-course in its attempt to create a "creepy" vibe through the introduction of random props shaped like some strange person; these are "hastily" fashioned from available tree branches, but look too polished to be "crude." Of course, you also get far-away recorded audio of screams and random sounds meant to invoke something much darker than originally thought. Again, good idea, but it fails because it's an old plot device: random scream, investigation of random scream, find nothing. The movie ends up with the group (minus one person who has been killed, apparently) somehow finding this random cabin in the middle of the woods, which is where this "Witch" resided so long ago. The movie ends with the final two filmmakers running through the house and being somehow dispatched in the basement by some unknown force. The final shot is of the original leader of the trio being apparently attacked from behind and the camera hitting the floor. And that's it.
Honestly, I felt dumber for having watched this movie and, ultimately, happy I missed it when it first blew up. The idea is great, but it leaves so many open ends, which means that the people making it were praying that this low-budget "experiment" hit big enough to generate buzz for a high-value sequel, which never materialized. Of course, the film did well and grossed a major amount of money, but a sequel seems absolutely out of the question since most folks didn't care enough to want a follow-up to a movie about a witch/killer in which the witch/killer never makes an honest appearnce on screen. Frankly, with all the buzz, I expected more and it just fell flat. I think a better attempt was made with "Cloverfield," but that was also a big-budget "low budget" film, so it's not all that much better, but it is still better.
I know Blair Witch is fast-approaching it's tenth anniversary. Maybe something else will surface and add more to what could have been a good base to work from... however, I don't have much faith there. If there is, I may attempt to get into the buzz, but I don't have high hopes for it.
There are some times, well, often really that I'm just flat-out late to some big phenomena. There will be some national/global event that people are deeply-involved in that I just completely miss. It's either due to a laziness, apathy, or a mixture of both; although it's usually that I just don't care enough to put forth the effort. I want to, but I just don't. Although I will say that, sometimes, missing these events tends work out in my favor. Take, for example, "The Blair Witch Project."
Of course, I know exactly what the film's about and knew it even when it was out. However, I chose not to go to it because I didn't see why people got so enthralled with a movie that, at best, was a pseudo-documentary. I know it was "groundbreaking" in that it was a film made on somewhat lo-tech equipment for a paltry cost (something like 50 thousand dollars? I know it was a small amount). Of course, movies like this have been made since the dawn of movie cameras, it's just that they hadn't made it to mass distribution until "The Blair Witch."
For those unfamiliar, the story is a "documentary" in which a trio of folks heads into the woods to investigate the legend of a "witch" who lived in the woods. Turns out, the "witch" is actually some insane killer who slaughtered a few folks. The unfortunate aspect is that the three people who go seeking this legend are eventually killed and their equipment turns up later. So the overall idea is that you're seeing this hastily-constructed footage of their trip; interestingly, the "documentary" you are seeing is the documentary of a documentary being made. So that's three layers of fake documentary it would appear. And that's the start of this film's downhill slide.
Most of the film seems to be about the filmmakers' various oddities, which mostly consists of them taking an opportunity to say "fuck" all the time and little else. Frankly, I think the purpose of the dialogue is just to provide the actual "Blair Witch"producers to have people say "fuck" all the time. The dialogue is pretty sparse and attempts to mimic "real" interactions of real people. Sadly, no. It fails. I'll give it points for effort, I guess, since the "Blair Witch" filmmakers were trying to be innovative.
The one good part of the film is the attempt to make it look real. I applaud the fact that the producers essentially gave three people two cameras and audio equipment, turned them loose in the woods, and told them to come back in a couple weeks with a few thousand feet of footage. You can tell there's not a whole lot of polish to it and that's pretty much the point. Now, had they attempted to keep it in that vein, then it'd be great. However, the film goes off-course in its attempt to create a "creepy" vibe through the introduction of random props shaped like some strange person; these are "hastily" fashioned from available tree branches, but look too polished to be "crude." Of course, you also get far-away recorded audio of screams and random sounds meant to invoke something much darker than originally thought. Again, good idea, but it fails because it's an old plot device: random scream, investigation of random scream, find nothing. The movie ends up with the group (minus one person who has been killed, apparently) somehow finding this random cabin in the middle of the woods, which is where this "Witch" resided so long ago. The movie ends with the final two filmmakers running through the house and being somehow dispatched in the basement by some unknown force. The final shot is of the original leader of the trio being apparently attacked from behind and the camera hitting the floor. And that's it.
Honestly, I felt dumber for having watched this movie and, ultimately, happy I missed it when it first blew up. The idea is great, but it leaves so many open ends, which means that the people making it were praying that this low-budget "experiment" hit big enough to generate buzz for a high-value sequel, which never materialized. Of course, the film did well and grossed a major amount of money, but a sequel seems absolutely out of the question since most folks didn't care enough to want a follow-up to a movie about a witch/killer in which the witch/killer never makes an honest appearnce on screen. Frankly, with all the buzz, I expected more and it just fell flat. I think a better attempt was made with "Cloverfield," but that was also a big-budget "low budget" film, so it's not all that much better, but it is still better.
I know Blair Witch is fast-approaching it's tenth anniversary. Maybe something else will surface and add more to what could have been a good base to work from... however, I don't have much faith there. If there is, I may attempt to get into the buzz, but I don't have high hopes for it.
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